Sara Zielinksi wrote “Animal Magnetism: How Salmon Find Their Way Back Home” for NPR in 2013. She described the mystery of the Red Sockeye Salmon and their herculean task of traveling thousands of miles back to their “native river” (birthplace) to spawn and die. Somehow, the location of their “native river” is imprinted when they are hatched. And this imprinting allows them eventually to navigate the treacherous journey home.
The story reminded me of a family we know who adopted their daughter from an Ethiopian orphanage. I shared with them the circumstances of my own adoption. What I didn’t share was that their daughter would one day need to find her own “native river”.
The search for my “native river” started sometime in college. In the midst of my new found freedom, I had this existential crisis where I finally needed to find out who I was. Part of this included facing the death of my parents. Such an exhilarating yet painful process. Exhilarating because I finally allowed myself to know them but painful because I realized that they would never be able to share my journey with me.
For the first time in my life I was able to explore my past and what it meant to me. This search gave me meaning for my existence in the world.
I had no choice as my “native river” was calling me home.
Childhood lost 